Waiting
by LoveChilde
Summary: During the 'Mutants No More' arc, the GenX kids have nothing to do but wait.


It's been one week ****

Disclaimer and notes: The characters and concept belongs to Marvel Comics. I wrote this last year, during the 'Mutants No More' arc, which had lots of potential IMO, and was really underused. So I wrote GenX during that time. Hope you enjoy it. The format is a series of short first person POV monologues.

It's been two weeks since we all lost our powers. 

I sit in my office, trying to tell myself that it's so quiet because I've had it soundproofed, but I'm fooling myself. I can't hear minds, and it's driving me insane. Again. Losing my powers twice inside a year- can it be an omen? Maybe the High Evolutionary was right.

Oh, I know he wasn't. I also know that he meant well, and screw those who suffered. The many outweigh the few, right? The kids are…troubled, to say the least, but they are taking this very maturely. I'm worried about Jono-he's still in a coma, you know. Angelo and Paige spend all their time by his bed, with the others replacing them every now and then. Even the Beast was baffled by it. Jono has his face back now-too bad he can't enjoy it…

Angelo? He looks like a normal teen again, but he won't go out. He says he'd feel guilty to enjoy himself with Jono the way he is. Again, I understand, but it still seems wrong. Paige is taking it rather well, for someone who's waited he whole life to manifest her powers. I suspect that she is too distraught because of Jono to care. Yet. Monet hasn't said more than five words to anyone since she tried to fly that morning and fell down the stairs. The awkwardness of a cast on her left arm must make it even harder for her. Losing perfection is difficult, to say the least. I've tried to get her to open up, but she wouldn't cooperate. Maybe if you came back she'd open up to you.

You really should be making plans to come back, you know. I'm sure the X-Force people need you, but I need help. There. I've admitted it-I need your help. I can't keep asking Everett and Jubilee to take care of the younger children. They, at least, are enjoying our new lives, and try to spend as long as they can outside. Keeping them outside and busy stops them from asking difficult questions like why won't Jono play with them. Everett and Jubilation have been very helpful, and if they are disturbed by the change they hide it well. I could wish the rest would be like them, but it worries me too much. This denial can't be good for them.

Please come back soon Sean.

*****

They need me here Em. Got your e-mail, by the way. I can't come back yet, although I really do want to. They say Pete Wisdom might come to replace me soon. Tell the kids I send my best.

You're not the only one who misses her powers, you know. I can't stand the sound of my voice now-it sounds hollow and flat, and it can't take me anywhere. I miss flying. Theresa feels the same, but of course she's had experience with loss of power- loss of all sound- in the past months.

I'm sorry. Hold on, and tell me if you want one of the X-Men to come help you. They are slightly off balance now, you know. No world to protect and no one to protect it from. I suppose we're lucky that even the human villains have taken a break. I'll call soon.

*****

Ah sure hope Sam won't be the one they send to help. Ah won't be able to look him in the eye. We're both normal now, but I'm sure he's taking it better. Ah'm telling you, Jono, I'm about to fall apart. And I hate it; it's weak and pathetic. My whole life is in front of me. I've lost something so minor it was only…my whole life. It's what I am, Jono, and now I don't know what to do with myself. I don't want to leave, but there's no reason to stay any longer. Except for you. You have such a lovely face…I run my hand over it, but you don't notice, do you? Please wake up, Jono…

*****

This is too strange. I've lost my power, and I don't care. I don't feel different, and, other than the fact we don't train anymore, my life hasn't really changed. I see the others-they're depressed, miserable, even Jubes-and I'm not. No more powers means no more mutant fear, no more fighting. Means I can go back home. What is wrong with me? I should be feeling bad, but the only time I even notice it's gone is when I try to locate someone by their aura, and can't. It hurts a bit, but I can always just ask.

Would've been worse if they'd all lost their powers, and I'd be the only one left. A guy who can imitate others wouldn't have much to do in a world where he's the only one… Meanwhile, at least I can help Ms. Frost.

*****

Perfection.

It's hard to lose… I'm still better than others at most things, but I'm mostly average now, and I don't know who to feel sorry for-myself for being in this situation, or the others, who are stuck in it permanently. No, no question-I feel sorry for me. They don't know any better; I do. Being just-fairly good - is not enough…Second best is never good enough once you've been at the top. 

Even worse now-about the first thing I'd discovered was that I'm not invulnerable any more. Almost forgotten what that felt like. I found that out right after I found out I can't fly anymore. Lucky for me I'm right handed. 

There might be a good side to this-now that I know imperfection I will be more forgiving in the future with all those who are less fortunate than me. That is, if we ever get our powers back. It's getting more and more difficult to believe that.

Oh, who am I kidding?

*****

You'll get better, man. I've lost too many friends already. You're not gonna die on me- not now, not like this. When you wake up we'll go to town. Just us, in the flesh- no image inducers- normal people. Bet you haven't done that in a long time. I know I haven't. All you have to do is wake up. 

You're not brain dead, you know. Dr. McCoy says your body just couldn't cope with the shock of regaining all those organs, so you sent yourself to sleep. It's up to you.

Meanwhile, the X-Men have gone into space, to try to convince the Evolutionary guy to give us back our powers. Emma says things in Genosha are getting worse. For all of us, I hope they succeed.

It's strange seeing my face in the mirror now- normal skin, in normal quantities. Funny. It's been two weeks and I've gone out maybe three times. The others stay away, busy with their own problems, and I'm grateful for that, because I still don't know what I'll say if anybody asks me how I feel.

*****

It's amazing how much fun a girl can miss in two weeks. I've been to most parks, amusement parks and malls in the area these past two weeks, and I'm still down. Maybe it has something to do with the kids. I go with them, of course. Emma calls it 'introducing them to the world'. Translation: 'Try to keep them busy 

and out of the house.' Least I can do, I guess.

So, sure, the kids look like kids now. I liked them better when they were pink and green-much more difficult to lose in a crowd. These days it seems I'm constantly looking for one or the other- is this the way mothers feel? If it is, I pity them.

Speaking about pity- I'm kinda worried about M. The girl is so deep in 'de-nile' the 'gators are about to eat her alive. She still manages to look superior, and she doesn't help out. Guess it's harder for her to get used to it. Screw harder, one of these days I'll corner her and make her start sharing the load.

Me? I'm fine. Same old firecracker. Am I just a cracker now I've lost the sparks? I hope not. Miss 'em, though. I suddenly feel vulnerable, even though I can still fight. Want an example? Fine: one evening I was with Ev and the kids in a funfair, and I got separated, 'kay? So, I'm trying to find them when this bunch of guys starts to bother me. In the end, I'm running and they're chasing. With my power, I could've beaten all four, easy. Even without, I stood a fair chance, but I couldn't bet on it, so I ran. Right into Wolvie. He still fights, but his healing factor's gone and he's dying. No, back off- don't want to think about that. He helped me out, but I could se the pain in his eyes. I can't help him this time.

He's in space now, with the others, trying to talk, or punch, some sense into the High Evolutionary. . Good luck to them. I just hope they're fast enough. Wish I could go wthem. Wish Sewould get back. Wish Jono'd wake up already. Hope we all get our powers back soon.

Sometimes, like now, all we have is hopes and wishes. Wish I could be sure it's enough. Hope it is.

*****

"Any word?" The question was a low whisper, as if careful not to wake the comatose person on the bed. Angelo looked at Jubilee questioningly. She shook her head.

"We lost contact with them after they took off. We have no idea where they are." The reply was also whispered, Jubilee's usual optimism laid aside. It reasserted itself, though, "They'll make it. Don't worry." But they both did. "How's Jono?" She asked.

"No change. He's alive, but only just." Angelo rubbed his eyes tiredly.

"Go get some sleep." Jubilee pulled him up, "I'll watch him. Ev's taking care of the kids for the next hour-they're watching TV or something. Shoo!" She pushed him lightly out of the room, then sat down and took Jono's lifeless hand in hers. "I'll watch him…'cause there ain't nothing else I can do." She said to herself. Unwanted tears filled her eyes, and she blinked them away. Now, more than ever, she had to keep her hopes up.

*****

Angelo walked up the stairs slowly. He waved to Ev in the rec-room, stopped to check on Paige, who was absorbed in a CD in her room, taking a time out from the world. She was doing it more lately, and it was starting to bother him. He didn't disturb her though- if she wanted to escape, it was her right, and he had no right to ask her to stop. He saw Emma coming out of the office, and stopped to see if she had any news. She shook her head.

"They've lost contact with them on Muir Island. Still, during the time that I've known them, the X-Men have never backed down from a challenge-they'll pull through this one as well." The words sounded hollow to both of them. Emma tried hard to smile. "Sean will be coming home the day after tomorrow, though." She said. Angelo forced a smile too.

"Good. He might take some of the load of your shoulders." Who am I kidding? Angelo asked himself, It'll only be two worried, helpless grown-ups instead of one.

"Yes. Go get some sleep." Emma patted Angelo's shoulder. The children all seem more mature without their powers. Emma mused. Were we getting too dependent on them? Will they still be as mature when they get them back? Do I even have to bother about that? We might never find out. Emma pushed those thoughts out of her mind. She tried to ignore the empty feeling in her heart. Even without telepathy she knew everyone felt about the same as she did-empty. She walked into the rec-room and joined Everett and the younger children, trying to concentrate on the colorful images on the screen, to fill the emptiness in her mind with color and sound.

Waiting.


End file.
